[ti:this grudge]
[ar:alanis morissette]
[al:so-called chaos]

[offset:500]
[00:08.42]
[00:10.42]fourteen years
[00:13.35]thirty minutes
[00:15.64]fifteen seconds i’ve
[00:19.48]held this grudge
[00:21.70]
[00:22.49]eleven songs
[00:25.43]four full journals
[00:27.83]thoughts of punishment
[00:31.49]i’ve expended
[00:33.97]
[00:34.48]not in contact
[00:37.47]not a letter
[00:39.97]such communication
[00:43.55]telepathic
[00:45.90]you’ve been vilified
[00:49.55]used as fodder
[00:52.21]you deserve a piece
[00:55.53]of every record
[00:58.00]
[00:58.71]but who’s it hurting now?
[01:04.66]who’s the one that’s stuck?
[01:10.66]who’s it torturing now
[01:14.34]with an antique knot in her stomach?
[01:19.51]
[01:21.89]i want to be big and let go
[01:25.33]of this grudge that’s grown old
[01:27.89]all this time i’ve not known
[01:31.49]how to rest this bygone
[01:34.05]i wanna be soft and resolved
[01:37.45]clean of slate and released
[01:40.05]i wanna forgive for the both of us
[01:45.61]
[01:46.16]like an abandoned house
[01:49.98]dusty covered
[01:52.95]furniture
[01:55.98]still intact
[01:58.17]if i visit it now
[02:01.35]will i simply re-live it
[02:04.99]somehow gratuitous
[02:10.35]
[02:11.09]but who’s still aching now?
[02:17.06]who’s tired of her own voice?
[02:23.14]who is it weighing down
[02:26.90]with no gift from time of said healing
[02:32.35]
[02:34.44]i want to be big and let go
[02:37.83]of this grudge that’s grown old
[02:40.30]all this time i’ve not known
[02:43.89]how to rest this bygone
[02:46.54]i wanna be soft and resolved
[02:49.95]clean of slate and released
[02:52.56]i wanna forgive for the both of us
[02:58.64]
[02:58.99]maybe as i cut the cord
[03:02.07]veils will lift from my eyes
[03:04.95]maybe as i lay this to rest
[03:07.76]dead weight off my shoulders will rise
[03:12.63]
[03:14.72]here i sit
[03:17.67]much determined
[03:19.90]ever ill-equipped
[03:23.33]to draw this curtain
[03:26.11]how this has entertained
[03:29.60]validated
[03:32.07]and has served me well
[03:34.81]ever the victim
[03:38.09]
[03:38.70]but who’s done whining now?
[03:44.36]who’s ready to put down
[03:50.41]this load i’ve carried longer
[03:54.79]than i had cared to remember
[04:00.09]
[04:02.23]i want to be big and let go
[04:05.52]of this grudge that’s grown old
[04:07.98]for the life of me i’ve not known
[04:11.51]how to rest this bygone
[04:14.15]i wanna be soft and resolved
[04:17.50]clean of slate and released
[04:20.17]i wanna forgive for the both of us
[04:26.15]i want to be big and let go
[04:29.64]of this grudge that’s grown old
[04:32.10]for the life of me i’ve not known
[04:35.63]how to rest this bygone
[04:38.25]i wanna be soft and resolved
[04:41.65]clean of slate and released
[04:44.26]i wanna forgive for the both of us
[04:50.84]
[04:54.14]
[05:01.09]end